37 - Your Purpose and the Power of Money
If you’re in debt, If you’re barely making enough to get by and don’t have time for vacations or fun things, this is for you.
Or maybe you do, but all your money goes to your debt and when bills came and you freak out. If either of these are you, then this episode is for you.
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What is Money?
We all want it, we all need it.
If we had no money, we wouldn’t send our spouses to work, we wouldn’t want to work for money.
And if you are telling yourself that money isn’t what matters, it’s relationships and family. Then go ahead and give all your money away and live off those relationships.
How does that feel?
That feeling right there, if you actually imagined doing what I said, is the basis of your current relationship with money right now.
Because, believe it or not, most of our decisions in life are based on money.
But it’s not money that matters, it’s relationships. . . right?
Yes, relationships are absolutely important but If money doesn’t matter and you firmly believe that then go ahead and give away all your money.
You can have either money or a good relationship. You can have both of that.
What is it with this “either-or mentality”?
This might also come up as “it’s not money that matters, it’s the purpose, right?”
I certainly believe having a purpose and knowing your passion is essential to your happiness.
Why? Because if you don’t feel like you have a purpose, that leads to a lot of depression, anxiety and all these mental challenges that we run into.
And stop telling yourself, “I don’t know.”
There is a connection with your passion, your purpose, and your money.
It doesn’t mean that because you want money, you should give up your passion or your purpose. Nor does it mean you have to give up your spirituality or attempts to be “good”.
Ever heard, “Money is the root of all evil”?
Everybody walks around saying that.
But the true scripture reference says, “The love of money is the root of all evil.” (1 Timothy 6:10).
There’s a very big difference.
So yes, your perception of money is actually the relationship you have with it. If you don’t have the income you want yet, then chances are you’re relationship with money needs some work.
The Easiest Way to See Your Relationship with Money.
This will take just a few moments in a quiet space where you can call up sounds or images in your mind.
Imagine there’s a river.
This river is filled with money.
Notice the volume; how full is this river of money? How much is there?
Also, make note of where the river is flowing. Where is the flow of this money river? Is this fast or slow?
Don’t try to change it, there’s nothing wrong with it. Just accept and be aware of what’s happening.
Now, where are you standing in relation to this river?
Because, If you see this river somewhere far from you. Chances are the way you view money is just really hard to get, hard to attain for you.
What if you try to pick up some of the money? What happens? Does it slip out of your hands? How much are you able to hold onto?
If you’re trying to make a dam or take as much as you possibly can (before it goes away) chances are you have a scarcity complex – like it’s gonna run out and you have to grab it while you can.
This simple technique tells you far more about your relationship with money than years of self-help books. Take note of the vision in your mind and ask what the general feeling is.
Is this how you want to feel about money?
Learn to take that river and allow it to just flow. There’s an abundance and enough amount of money everywhere. The money replenishes, there is no reason to hoard it. Be calm & at peace because there’s enough for you.
The same way you have you’re relationship with people it’s the same way with money. It’s time to heal your relationship with money.
So Why do YOU want the money?
Seriously, ask yourself right now. If you had $XXX more money (either monthly or just 1 time), what would you do with it.
Make a mental note of that reason.
Many people I talked with said they would do the responsible thing and get out of debt or put the money in savings. Others wanted to save up for Christmas or a special vacation to see their families.
So now it’s your turn, ask yourself why do you want the money? Think of all the reasons, get deeper and ask yourself, why is that so important to you? Why does it matter?
I always recommend going 5 levels deep because the first 3 levels are generally just stereotypes and easy responses.
Money is For: I want $15,000 so I can get completely out of debt
Why #1: Why is it important to get out of debt? —> So I don’t owe anyone anything and can free up my money for more fun things.
Why #2: Why is that important to you? —> Because debt is bad.
Why #3: Why is debt so bad that you want to get out of it so fast? —> Because it’s restrictive, it shows that I was out of control with my spending, and it feels so suffocating.
Why #4: And why is that? —> Because I was irresponsible and the debt is daily proof that I’m irresponsible with my money and I want to be free of that irresponsibility.
Why #5: And why is it important to be free of that irresponsibility? —> Um…. I guess it’s because then it means that I’m responsible with my money instead of irresponsible. And I won’t have to live with that awful reminder all the time.
Ah-ha! Now we are getting somewhere. If you just made it all the way through the 5 levels, you win a gold star! Give yourself a pat on the back and celebrate because this recognition alone is a HUGE accomplishment!
Above was step 1. If you completed it, I seriously want you to celebrate your big win.
And when you are ready, move on to step 2.
Why Are You Letting Money Have Power Over You?
Look at the reason you gave after the 5th why in the activity above.
So basically, you are telling yourself that money will ___________.
Using the example above, you are saying that money has the power to make you a responsible person?
It sounds so silly when we say it out loud or write it on paper! How can an inanimate object like money really have the power to change who we are? I’ll give you a secret right now: no amount of money will ever change how you feel about yourself.
YOu must change how you feel about yourself FIRST, and then when more money comes, it will just be fun and easy – without the weight of all you are expecting it to do for you.
Think of it this way: If you treated a person like you treat money, you would generally be clingy, desperate, needy, and an angry mess.
Try this next time you’re around a group of friends. Simply throw out that you were busy balancing the budget today. See what kind of responses you get.
“ugh, that’s the worst”, “I hate doing the budget”, “sucks doesn’t it”, etc.
And the sad thing is, many people do actually treat their partners the way they treat money. IN a more long term relationship, one of the #1 things people fight about is the finances/money. It’s really their own fight with money that they take out on their partner.
So what does that tell you about your relationship with money?
The French Secret to Happy Finances
The French are masters at understanding the concept of your present being your future.
They know that if they want a different future, they must alter their reactions to the present.
But I want you to also know that what you have is enough for what you want. You have enough right now, at this moment for that need. All this time, money has no power over you and it just becomes fun.
So take a look at the way you’re spending money – it is telling you exactly what your priorities are. And remember, this is a no-judgement zone. It’s simply sending information about how your present spending is expressing your priorities.
Most of us tend to spend based on the priorities of others. Today is YOUR DAY to take back your own power. 🙂
Only spend money on what you value.
This is a phenomenal for getting out of debt.
It’s not about the price tag, or how free or discounted it is. If you do not value an item, do not buy it! If you don’t have $4,000 saved up for the couches you really want, don’t buy the cheap ones now, but rather ask HOW you can come up with the money.
Start to pay attention to how you’re spending money and you’ll be really surprised how much power you’re giving money over you especially when you’re emotional.
You got this lovely!